What do I do next?

What do I do? The scariest part of growth is decision-making only becomes harder. 

Too many times there are evidently stupid decisions and life is about choosing the good over the bad. But when you grow past your demons and start to see what you’ve sowed finally come to fruition, you are forced to make decisions between good and better. And that’s really scary because we’re afraid whatever we choose will be wrong. Perhaps this is why free time (wait that exists?) can seem daunting. With so many choices what do I do?

 I have the opportunity to do what I love in this moment and feel joy from it. Can I really complain about what I’m not doing right now? Does it mean that I will write this until my fingers fall off? Of course not. Everything has its proper timing and being present enough to understand that is comforting.

Just like you can’t spell hello without hell you can’t spell goodbye without good. Everything you look forward to meeting is going to come with its fair share of hell. And saying goodbye to things, even things you love, will have its fair share of good. When you have enough peace to understand that you will have strength to decide between good and better. 

What is your heart calling you to become?

You could be many things. Or you could pursue one passion at a time until you find what you’re looking for. Embrace the good. Have faith in the bad. And do that which excites you out of bed, ready the next night to reflect on the wonders you had.

    Two mindsets help a lot in life. Having the hope to see that bad days are only temporary and having the wisdom to admit that accomplishments are overrated.

      So much inner turmoil is caused when we start to make our problems bigger than they have to be. Whenever I’m having a bad day I keep repeating to myself this day is not representative of my life. It’s not about fixing it or figuring it out. Some days are just destined to be a struggle, to build your character. If you have bad days accept them. Trust that storms shall pass and you’ve won half the battle.

The other mindset can be just as tricky: not getting too giddy when things go good. There's a certain sadness after you experience something that you were really excited for. Whenever I’m really excited for something I get very discouraged when it ends because it's like now what? 

   But the ability to see blessings as temporary humbles you to soak in each moment. So back to that question: what do I do? I think you already know the answer. Stop second-guessing and follow your heart. 

   Appreciate everything and everyone, and stop beating yourself up about decisions you didn't make. I almost didn't write this because of fear of failure and the countless other things I could be doing. Yet trying means everything because it shows you have an attitude of, “Screw it, let's chase my dream anyway.”  And even if you have imperfections, in a world of quitters that attitude is pretty badass.

  Do the next thing right, take care of the little one inside, and give yourself props for even trying. After reading this, don't overthink what you will do, just make sure you love it and it fits your style too.